You're sick.....? Mmmm....... Are you really okay....? Do you feel really
bad...? Do I worry and ask too much...?
Sorry......
Is camp really boring...? What did you do...? Cook....?
Mmm... I'm curious to know... Can you cook...? Just asking.....
Why won't you tell me who's the most important... HMPH! MEANIE! AND HOW AM I
SUPPOSED TO KNOW YOU'RE TELLING THE TRUTH?!?!
MEANIE MEANIE MEANIE!
merged: 08-26-2007 ~ 01:02pm
........ I'm sure next year's camp will be better.......
Is it really really me...? And you told me 3 times...
you know... if you stop wishing and try that wish will probably come ture...
....
more or so you can always grant your own wish if you really want them to
happen..... .....
Quote by vatican92Hehe I remembered
your birthday Sara!
It's not that great but hope you like it
Haven't talked for a while.......
Well wherever you are, take care and be safe!
hiiiiii lil bro! ^^
soo sweet ^^ thanks alot for remembering, i really appreciate it and the card is
lovely ^^
yea i miss you too, was out on vacation but i am back now at last so i hope we
will get to talk soon ^^
thanks again vati-chan ^^
take care and i hope things are going good for you
see you soon,
Bro we are both 15 now! *claps* DDDDDDD
I'm glad you remebered my bday. Since I feel like most people forgot...I think I
know why. But....I shouldn't say anything...and it's kinda mean. Maybe I'm
jealous...I dunno...if I see you on msn I'll tell you what I think if you want
me to. [:
I was kinda sad yesterday cause I felt like none of my MT friends remembered my
bday. And now I feel kinda selfish...I mean...I shouldn't expect them to. It's
not like I'm gonna remember theirs everytime...
But maybe I should try to...maybe thats why they all forgot. Because I probably
didn't remember theirs...I'm so stupid and selfish...But I think I'll try harder
next time. [:
Sorry I'm talking so much. And mostly about myself.
How are you? I hope your okay. [:
family problems ahhhh....well whatever they are i hope it turns out okay....and
your welcome i alwways care a bout my friends even if they don't want me too...
It's not your fault you don't have to say sorry....
I'm just glad you take the time to care about me....
But promise me you won't forget about me if you make new friends okay...? ^_^
Have a nice trip...
Quote by vatican92Hihi sis!
I know it's not your birthday yet....... but I can't give it to you on tomorrow
so....... I'll just give it to you today
I know it's not that good but I was out of idea TTTwTTT
But hope you enjoy ^^
Quote by vatican92
Elizabeth!........ I missed you a lot TTwTT
I do have hope........ but I don't want to blame anybody else........
It's....... hard to change who I am......... But I'm getting better at least
I've changed quite a lot....... but I do have bad days...... and when I do, I go
back to my gloomy old self again
........ Yeah....... maybe I did........ make Caroline sad........
Hehe...... I have some great friends........
Well...... my thought was that........ because I love somebody enough to
sacrifice myself, it makes me also happy if I can change somebody's life even a
tiny bit......... am I wrong?......... umm........
You have a kind and understanding heart Elizabeth........
I have a hard time understanding how others feel........ because I'm.......
always having hard time just trying to find out how I feel about
something
I don't........ really mind them scolding me anymore....... I wish...... they'd
just not fight anymore
They fought again on my birthday this year....... and...... they said...... that
they don't trust each other anymore........ I always wondered if they would get
divorced....... I was...... always scared of that.......
I wished they would...... but at the same time I didn't because I didn't want to
be alone.......
Hehe...... but I think they forgot all about the fight........
They always do....... I think they also have really bad memory because they
always seem like they never fought after 3 or 4 days
I am grateful that I have friends who care about me ^^
...... I'm just....... a bit scared of Koreans......... and I just....... have a
lot of bad memories because of them........
Elizabeth..... it doesn't really matter if I marry an atheist or a buddhist but
I just said Christian because if I married somebody with another religion, they
might not like me going to church and stuff.........
And Elizabeth...... you might not really care much about God or religion but to
me God is different from your perspective of God......
Well I won't go too far into it since you might not be interested in it and I
don't really know much about God either
Uuu...... You are so kind TTnTT
Well Elizabeth............. umm........ I don't really know what else to say
I...... well....... sorry......
See you ^^
You're the most stupid person I ever met..... But.... I still like you....
I guess you're not wrong and I'm not right either.. We all think differently....
But.. It's not like I know what I really think....
I just think everything is equal....
Why should you be scared of your parents getting divorced...?
I'm not sure if my father now is my real father cause my parents aren't
married....
I have a step mother, step sister and step brothers....
My mother scolds me every single day and forcess me to study for 5 hourse
everyday.....
I'm the second smartest in the whole class.....
I mostly get all As.... I've only got a C once in my whole life and I have never
failed....
yet..... My mother never praises me... She thinks I'm an idiot...
She complains about me and always says that she wishes I never existed and that
she wishes I weren't her daughter and how she wishes someone else was her
daughter....
My father barely comes home and since I was little I always tried so hard to
please him but he only says how good others are.....
I have no friends in real life and my mother hits me when I cry....
You don't see me complaining.... Even if your parents really divorce... They'll
still love you...
And if they divorce and you feel sad for a long time you'll regret it.....
It won't make a difference if you always wander on your past....
............ If your wife didn't like you just because you pray and go to church
she's an idiot and she doesn't really love you....
Someone that loves you wouldn't judge you by your appearence or what you do but
who you are...
I don't know what I'm saying because no one has ever told me they loved me but
you.. If you really mean it...
I don't know much about god.... I'm not even buddhist..... I'm no
religion....
Don't hate me for saying this... But.... They always say god is good... God
teaches you good...
But I don't agree with that.... because I don't believe anyone is fully good not
even god... And... There is no right and wrong...
Sorry if you hate me now...
Understanding...? ...... The only thing I understand is that birds eat....
...... Sorry I'm so cold today... Am I cold...? I don't remember....
merged: 08-22-2007 ~ 09:31pm
Quote by vatican92
Hehe..... I love you too sweety EliXD
We do think differently...... but you are right about us being all
equal
I guess........ I didn't........ want them fighting anymore........
Maybe I thought it would be better if they did get divorced but I was afraid
that...... maybe that my parents would just throw me away........ if they get
sick of carrying me around......
I have seen....... so many people suffering...... but I never understood their
pains truely because I've never experienced it
I know that your parents love you too.........
I'm not sure how your family relationship works....... but all parents love
their child.........
My father said many cruel things too....... that I was useless and I would be
better off somewhere in the streets.......
He told me to get out the house few times....... and when I did go out, my
father came to look for me......
I believe that your parents are like that too..........
Umm Elizabeth........ well....... I don't know because........ some people put
importance on religion....... if you look at some religion, the people are
willing to kill others for their religion........
So...... well....... hmm........
I don't mind if my wife is buddhist, muslim or whatever as long as she doesn't
complain about my faith
I know...... but even families argue and have things they don't agree with
I do really mean it........ I love your understanding heart, and I love how you
care for others and how you help others
I understand how you feel....... I was....... an atheist until not so long
ago
Well not really an atheist because I believed that there was God but I didn't
have any faith in him
I understand why you think that........ but....... us humans are the ones who
are wrong....... and God is right
From our perspective, we might be right and God might be wrong but we aren't
perfect...... nobody is
And our consciousness of right and wrong is always varying from individual to
individual
But God did make us..... and he is the only one who knows everything and the
only one who is perfect
And I know that God loves me and cares for me and died for me.......
I hope that you'll understand that one day too ^^
I don't hate you at all....... just because we have different ideas that doesn't
mean I don't like somebody
If I did, that would mean I wouldn't like everybody who's not Christian
And...... that's not true.... there are some Christians that I....... really
don't like.........
A person is not determined solely by their belief but their heart as well
and I really do think that you have a beautiful and caring heart....
Hehe I know that birds to eat
Cold?......... Hmm are you cold?..... the weather is kinda hot here
Hehe take care Elizabeth and see you
You're the weirdest person I've ever met....
Well lucky you... Your father looked for you...
I'm always leaving the house at night and run to the park to sit on the swings
and sing and I don't come home till the nest day... And when i come home my
parents didn't even know I was gone...
All parents love their child... But I'm not even sure who are my parents....
My parents said I had a sister... then they say I was adopted... Then they say
I'm engaged... Then they say my dad is not my real dad... then they say I have a
step mother...
They keep on telling me strange things that it makes no difference to me
anymore...
But.... If they really force me to marry someone I met 1 hour ago I'll run away
from home... I'm sure they won't mind...
If I do leave my home they would forget I ever existed in a few days...
You know... Once.... I ran away from home for 2 months to stay with my friend in
England and when I came back my mother thought I was in my room...
Dose it really make a difference if I exist...
My dad forgot my name 18 times this year...
And my mom mistaken another kid for me 13 times this year...
I still don't get you.... Did god really create us....?
I don't know... I'm an idiot....
You know.... I cry but I don't know why... And I laugh when... I don't know
why...
And you know... I talk to birds and my reflection and animals and flowers.... I
don't know why...
And...... I day dream every night about y...... I can't tell you or you'll laugh
at me....
And...... I cut myself everyday for the purpose of I don't know... I just like
it when I see tears....
Pain... Feels nice.....
Am I being insane again... Sorry....
Sorry..... I don't feel well today..... vatican...... please... please don't
talk to me about Caroline or one of your friends if it's about how great they
are and ow you worry about them this week..... Please....
Sorry..... But... Just for this week..... I really don't feel like listening to
how great you think they are right now....
Uuumm.... Don't worry... It's not because I feel that you care about them more
then me... And... I'm not jealous.....
Its just... I don't feel like listening to your complains this week....
I'm sorry..... I just really don't feel like making people happy this week.....
I don't think I can anyway.... Esspecially with such a moody expression....
Have... A nice day....
Right now?........ Well....... sometimes I do have hard time keeping things
together......
Lonely..... well......... Not too much because I do have friends here
Although I don't have too many friends in real life
By the way, how are you doing micey?
wow....i don't mean to take things the wrong way but in real life you mean out
of the computer... ..just saying hahaha OO and im fine perfectly okay but now that vatican is sad
a bit....i don't know what to do!...
Quote by vatican92I'm glad at least the
people you've met so far were nice..........
I guess it'll be harder for me to see you now........
Exal must be very social since it takes me a while to make one friend
Haha.... I'm too clumsy and full of mistakes.
I understand why people get angry at me.
Well....... mmm....... things usually goes wrong
But I'm holding on.... it'll be okay
Japanese sound very attractive as well
But I want to learn Russian first.
Okay
Hope to see you soon
ya...but i'm not sure if i'll be able to make friends...hmmm.....i don't really
care.....
it's like three girls in each room...and currently i'm the only one in my
room...the others who are to share the room with me will arive next week....so
till then i'm alone....
exal....i don't really understand her much......ha...i can't even understand
myself.....
hmm....good you know it....coz sometimes i don't know why people get angry at
me...and ya sometimes i do know.....
ok so....i'm glad things will get alright with you.....
well....then.....Good Luck with life.....and take care....
bye!
You idiot... Who said anything about not caring for your friends... Anyway.....
Even if I did say it.... If you believed what I said I'll hate you even
more....
Because I trusted that you thought I really cared about you... And if I did I
wouldn't ask you to stop caring for anyone....
I hate humans... They're a waste of oxygen..... I'm always caring about
others.... Always trusting them and smiling every single day... Every
moment....
I hate it..... I hate faking to be happy... I hate everyone.....
I wish I never existed.... I trusted you... I thought you believed me.... So....
Thank you for telling me you were like everyone else..... I wonder how it feels
to jump down a roof....
But I won't die for such foolish reasons.... I'm not a coward....
I hate trusting people..... Absolutely hate it.....
I only live to sing..... Well... Of course I did live because I wanted to spend
time with you.....
But you're an idiot.... Who's the mean one...? You don't even understand.....
I hate you the most..... More than anyone that ever betrayed me... I hate
you.....
I would hate you for as long as I live... No... I'll hate you forever.....
When I'm dead or alive..... I'm an idiot.... Because I trusted you.....
merged: 08-19-2007 ~ 03:29pm
You're an idiot! That's what I hate about you the most!
You're always blaming yourself for everything..... But don't you have any hope
at all....?
You have friends who care about you and you're not alone....
But you're always acting like this world is so horrible and you always think
sacraficing for your friends was good....
No wonder Caroline never got happy... Because... How can someone with no hope at
all try to give hope to someone else!
You're an idiot!
Your friends care about you! You're not the only one suffering when you feel
sad! Your friends are also sad when you're sad!
But.... Still... Even when they themselves are sad..... They're always trying to
help you....
Why are humans so stupid!
They think that sacraficing for the people they care about.... When they
sacrafice for them they feel happy...
Those kind of people are the real selfsish people!
they never think of how the person they sacraficed for would feel!
they never thought that they might be even more sad knowing someone important to
them suffered for them....
Why can't humans ever understand.....? Why are they always thinking wrong is
right....? Why are they always such idiots...? Why....?
No matter how many times I tell them over and over.... All they say is I'm
always so sad....
fine... They're right... I'm as stupid as them.... I'm always sad but I always
try to make others not sad....
We all have our problems... The richest person with everyone serving him is
still sad....
Why are humans never satisfied for what they have.... Everyday they only think
"My life is so horrible.... I wish I was dead..." but....
Each time they say that.... the people who care about them suffer double the
pain.....
It's harder to see someone you care about suffer then suffering yourself....
but I'm not a coward like you stupid humans! I am as dumb but I'm not as
cowardly!
Because I never ever tell myself how much I hate this world..... I never try to
think of those things....
Because I know I have people who care about me and that I don't have to go
through life alone....
My parents can be mean at times but still I know they still love me.... because
when I'm sick they're there for me....
My father doesn't always do what I was hoping... In fact... He never
dose.....
He forgets my birthday and he barely comes home and he always lies....
but I know he just wanted the best for me.....
Your mother and father sigh and scold you not because they want to see you
suffer....
they're worried about you..... Is that really wrong.....?
I'm sure.... Your parents fight but they still love eachother....
You love them, I'm sure of it..... But you're always hiding from them.....
If you told them how you feel.... they might not know what to do.....
But i'm sure... Sure that they are trying really hard to understand you and make
your life better......
like caroline... Even though she is so sad.... She always tells you to be
happier and she tries really really hard....
All your friends try their hardest to make you happy...... They really really
do......
Just like you said of how much you hate Koreans.....
Koreans... Chinese... Japanese...... And all the other religions.... Is there
really a difference....?
You said you would only marry a Christian.... But..... Christian or not they're
still human...?
I know I might not know much about god and those things...
but I know... Even god is not fully good..... No one is fully good....
Like me..... i may always try my best to make everyone happy...
But the truth is I'm selfish, bad tempered and not as good as you thought...
Goddess of mercy... Jesus... Budah.... What difference is there....? They're all
gods.....
For those who believe in god.... god is..... God...... All these gods have the
purpose of bringing happiness ^_^
So..... God... Shost... Or human.... We're just like one ^_^
God... Is not fully good... Shost is not fully bad... And human is just in
between... Good... And bad....
maybe people believe in god... Because long time ago there was this really smart
person that believed humans were created by god and ghost, god as good and ghost
as bad and together they form a human....
So please understand that we are all important.....
Have a nice day ^_^
Quote by vatican92
Well......... I mean that......... your family is kinda going their own
way........ I mean....... let's just go with what you said.........
I don't know...... sorry for assuming things....... I really don't want you to
be sad....... or frustrated.......
But just seemed to me that you seemed stressed out...... and I didn't really
know how you were feeling........
I see........ I think exal will be a bit lonely as well if she does go to that
boarding school......
Umm........ sorry............ I don't really know........ I forgot......... But
I didn't mean that
You really are a kind person........ And I can say to everybody without a
doubt
I see........ but it doesn't really matter...........
People always seem to get angry at me for some reason
You're not making me sad......... it's just me
I'm just tired I guess......... of things happening around me.........
I was actually hoping to take French when I first came to my school since I
enjoyed it when I learned it in elementary school but they didn't have French so
I decided to take Spanish instead..........
I see......... so by the time you write back next time, you'd already be
there....
Ok TT____TT I won't cry.........
You take care as well......... please
Always be safe.......
I'm so glad that you are my sister..............
i reached....it was about 12 the plane landed...it was a boring journey...i had
to pay for the food...so i only bought cookies.....
the institute is not that bad...it's ok...some of the students i met were
nice......we are only allowed to check our mail here if we want to sit on the
internet.....so i'm sitting in a cyber cafe now......and i don't think i can
come here every time.....* *
exal...no i don't think so...she never has any problem making
friends.....
WHAAAAT! how can any body get angry at such a cute chubby little
boy....
er...what's happening around you? sorry, but i can ask...can't i? did something
go wrong....
hmm...i want to learn japanese...
be happy ok....see ya..i'll try coming online again soon...
you prefer Fresh milk ~? Okies. *
brings in a carton of them into your room*
Ah, I prefer Orange juice but I can't intake them too much `cause I suffer from
a sensitive immunity system.
Well, all will be well once 31st Aug comes. cause right
now I am having my examinations. Ah, what do you like to eat ? what's the
weirdest stuff you ever tasted ? It's bat meat to me. I didn't know it was Bat
meat till my Mum told me so. 0_o It's sweet and tastes like chicken but
uguu~.... @_@ I agree with the line, " Some things are best left unknown
".
Quote by vatican92
.............. I love you sooo! much TT____TT
........ I don't know why you are saying that all of a sudden but I won't let
you be sad.......... well......... at least I'll try my best..........
Elizabeth...... I'm sorry that I always disappoint you...........
Really really sorry...........
That's........ all I can say.......... and I really do mean what I say
I know it's not good enough but I hope you'll remember that I'm also only a
human.......
I do feel sad........ I do feel angry...... and some times I feel happy
I do feel pain...... and sometimes I just want everything to go
away.........
My heart feels so.......... heavy and...... I just feel a bit down........ right
now
That I can't help Caroline....... that....... Caroline doesn't seem
happy.........
I feel so angry at exal for what she's done to Caroline........
I feel so....... helpless...... that you don't seem happy........
I do feel like crying everyday for every one of my friends
And sometimes I feel so selfish that I don't want to share the pain of my
friends.........
.........
Anyway........ I have to go now............
I really do care for you a lot........ please be......... safe...... and.......
just........ sorry........
Really sorry........
Please take care........
See you
......... Caroline... Pikac/aania..?
I'm sure exal loves her.... She's just stubborn and doesn't show it....
Exal has always been like that... Don't mind her....
She's stubborn and she gets angry really easily and she never admits it when she
dose something wrong...
But even though she doesn't show it she truly cares about her friends and
family....
.......... I don't want to be happy.... Because as long as I'm sad people will
care about me.....
If I'm happy I'll think about sad things so I can be sad forever....
I hate it when people talk about caring about others... Hate it hate it hate
it...
I hate my father because he only loves me with a quater of his heart....
I hate you because you never stop talking about others!
HATE YOU HATE YOU HATE YOU!
Quote by vatican92Yeah I was kinda like
that too........ Our family had to keep moving around just when I was about just
getting used to it and making friends
But it is sad that your family is splitting apart..........
Cheer up Caroline....... well.......... I really feel bad I can't help
out.........
You're nothing like that Caroline........ I know that you are a kind comforting
person.......... I know that because you're my sister and you've been a great
sister so far
I think exal........ is just......... well........
I don't know how her life is so I can't say why she's like that but I think she
has a reason
And I believe that you didn't do anything against exal..........
And you've comforted me also........
Ever since I've known you, I had lots of fun and comfort.........
Although I thought you were kinda acting
I'm not too kinda at all........
I thought you were much more nicer than me
I......... I'm not that kind........
And I agree........ you're not evil at all and I know it
Yeah..... and PE teachers are strict........
We can choose any subject as long as we take 4 years of math, 4years of English,
3 of social studies, 3 years of science and 2 years of foreign language
One day we should meet....... I'm thinking of meeting Elizabeth one day as
well
I get really nervous too....... and get really really quiet.......... but I
really want to meet you.........
I think I'll be okay.......
You be careful too my lovely sister
Have a safe flight......... I feel so sad TT___TT
And you aren't even leaving........ Well......... be
safe........
splitting? no...what i meant was we all will just be living in different
places....splitting sounds a strong word....
er...i feel that you're thinking that i'm really sad about something.....well,
no no...i'm not....it's just that i'm a little stressed out and nervous about
going there.....
exal.....ahhh....i don't know...she's ok....but sometimes she really sounds very
rude....she'll be happy now that i'm leaving.....
and what exactly do you mean by acting? do you
think i'm lying? or lied? or something like that......
oh yes...ofcourse i'm much better if i'm typing...coz i think and
write........sometimes....
but if i'm talking to someone face to face or on the phone.....well, it's
different....i don't really think much beore speaking....and i get angry very
soon....
vatican....if you're feeling sad coz of me....pls dont...i don't want to make
anybody sad...
so what foreign language are you interested in?
and i finally have everything packed and ready....my flight is tommorow at 9am,
i'll be laeving from home at 7am though....
so little vatican...be safe...and try not to be sad.... enjoy life.... and do
continue writing to me....or i'll cry....
<^^*)(*^^*SMILE
PLS*^^*)(*^^>
merged: 08-18-2007 ~ 01:18am
one more thing...Thank you
.....for taking time to write to me and also....for being my little brother...
..... Maybe you're not that bad.... Maybe I should think about marrying you
afterall...
Haha! Just kidding! ^_^
Well killing is wrong... But you can't blame your wife for caring about you and
taking revenge...
merged: 08-17-2007 ~ 11:49pm
I don't want to be happy.... I wish I could be sad forever.....
Quote by vatican92
Well I don't really like it but........ it doesn't really matter
I'll let you call me cute cuz you're really cute as well
Sit on me and squeeze me....... sounds really scary
I'd like to hug you too like a teddy bear
I don't remember doing any of those things I
don't get embarrassed....... and I don't complain
Well maybe I do complain once in a while but me no get embarrassed!
Hahahaha....... were you thinking of marrying me?....... I'd love to but.......
well yeah..........
Well actually nothing else really matters as long as they are Christian
If the person who I will marry can't understand me, I just want her to
understand everybody else........
I know that nobody can understand anybody perfectly but just to a certain
limit
If somebody is trying to kill me......... my wife will just have to save that
person.........
I'm not going to look for her....... I'm just going to wait and just go along
with my life and if I do find her, hopefully I will marry her
Are you thinking of getting married Elizabeth? Well maybe too early for you and
maybe not........ You still have a lot of time to think it through
Well they taste terrible!
I......... don't want anybody to kill anybody because of me........... if
somebody does, that person is not my hero......... that person is not anybody's
hero........
YOU ARE SO SWEET!
You do get embarresed..... Always....
Well... Think what you like! You do get embarresed....
>_> ...... Well...... I mean.... You're not that bad....... Pretty
cute..... Of course not!
What makes you think I would want to marry you! Of course not! Haha! Never! You are
sooo not good enough for me! Yes yes!
...... Christian...... Christian..... Christian...... Mmm.... Nope! I'm still
not Christian!
...... Wouldn't that be selfish...? If your wife saves that person... She will
feel sad for the rest of her life without you....
CORRECT! People who kill are NOT heroes! A+++ for that answer! ^_^
Quote by vatican92Caroline..........
well........... I can't help you........... I really really want to but the only
thing I can do is just pray for you........... and I am sorry for that...... but
since you chose to do this, I believe that you can do well whatever you do in
fashion or designing
I know at least a bit how things feel when things change around you and you have
to move into a new environment........ I've done that all my
life........
Leaving the things that are familiar to you........ to leave the place where you
call home........ leave the people who you call friends..........
If you don't feel like doing any work, just relax, do what you enjoy doing and
you can just do that later........ right?....... or maybe I'm wrong....... sorry
Well whether people there are nice or not, I think that you should approach them
first and be enthusiastic about what you're doing
I know that it's easy said than done but I know that you can be friends with
everybody there and help them out ^^
I am...... doing okay
Typhoons come very often in the Philippines........ but this time I heard it was
a super typhoon although i'm not sure what that is....... I don't think it's
here in the Philippines yet but I think it is in the path of typhoon........
School......... well....... no new friends yet and still kinda deciding what I
should take for courses....... Trying to change my schedule around........
I don't really like PE........ it's too hard and the teacher is too
strict...........
Elizabeth? Mmm........ I don't know how she is doing in her real life but she
didn't seem as gloomy as she was before so I'm glad she is......
Caroline......... I don't expect you to do anything for me but all I wish from
you is for you to be happy at least while you're living...........
I'm sure that we'll meet one day........ somehow
And remember that there are people who love you....... and I am one of those who
do
So always try your best ^^
it's not something new in my life.....since both my parents are in the
defence....so they get transfers every year...and we have to move.....it takes
me so long....atleast a year to get used to everyone....and then finally when i
get some friends....we have to leave.....my parents are going to get another
transfer next year......well, he was supposed to get two years back.....but
since this place is really good for schooling...he decided to take 2 years study
leave which is gonna end next year....i think my parents are planning to send
exal to some boarding next year.....and i don't think my mom will get posted to
the same place as my dad....so it seems by next year....all four of us will be
living separately....
my dad told me to complete the rest of the packing in the evening.....he went to
sleep ....and my mother is not at home...and exal won't help ...and i
can't do it alone.....
to be happy while i'm living? hmm....ya, nobody knows what's going to happen in
death....exal keeps telling i'll be thrown into the fiery lake of hell and burn
there forever.....ok, all she said was i think you'll end up in hell.....and i
keep asking her what have i done.......all she says you're just
meaneee.....sometimes i wonder am i really that evil to make someone think i'll
be thrown into....oh well, i don't really believe in hell or heaven.....what
strucks me is...am i that bad or......evil
about elizabeth.....i think you really have comforted her a lot....and that's
really nice....she seems very happy talking to you....
wish i could be nice too like you...wish i could help others....but i know i
can't....looks like that's how my nature is....but, i won't give up...i don't
want to...i'm not evil....
PE....i never liked that either....for a warm up we needed to take three circles
of the ground....and the ground of our school was so huge.....
...so what subjects do you have for choices?
meet you.... ...... ummm...that's...do you think something like that can
happen?....i really get nervous when i've to meet somebody...and i end up giving
such a serious look that the other person think i'm gonna eat him any
minute........but, ya i do want to meet my little brother....
you be careful ok...and specially from that super mega giant scary typhoon....
You're sick.....? Mmmm....... Are you really okay....? Do you feel really bad...? Do I worry and ask too much...?
Sorry......
Is camp really boring...? What did you do...? Cook....?
Mmm... I'm curious to know... Can you cook...? Just asking.....
Why won't you tell me who's the most important... HMPH! MEANIE! AND HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW YOU'RE TELLING THE TRUTH?!?!
MEANIE MEANIE MEANIE!
merged: 08-26-2007 ~ 01:02pm
........ I'm sure next year's camp will be better.......
Is it really really me...? And you told me 3 times...
merged: 08-26-2007 ~ 07:17pm
Smile....
you know... if you stop wishing and try that wish will probably come ture...
....
.....
more or so you can always grant your own wish if you really want them to happen.....
Vatican....... Uuumm... Who is the most important to you...?
spanish.....?
so..u can speak in spanish...?
can u translate "the golden angel" to spanish...or french....^^'
see ya and take care...
hiiiiii lil bro! ^^
soo sweet ^^ thanks alot for remembering, i really appreciate it and the card is lovely ^^
yea i miss you too, was out on vacation but i am back now at last so i hope we will get to talk soon ^^
thanks again vati-chan ^^
take care and i hope things are going good for you
see you soon,
your sis,
Sara
Bro we are both 15 now! *claps*
DDDDDDD
I'm glad you remebered my bday. Since I feel like most people forgot...I think I know why. But....I shouldn't say anything...and it's kinda mean. Maybe I'm jealous...I dunno...if I see you on msn I'll tell you what I think if you want me to. [:
I was kinda sad yesterday cause I felt like none of my MT friends remembered my bday. And now I feel kinda selfish...I mean...I shouldn't expect them to. It's not like I'm gonna remember theirs everytime...
But maybe I should try to...maybe thats why they all forgot. Because I probably didn't remember theirs...I'm so stupid and selfish...But I think I'll try harder next time. [:
Sorry I'm talking so much. And mostly about myself.
How are you? I hope your okay. [:
family problems ahhhh....well whatever they are i hope it turns out okay....and your welcome i alwways care a bout my friends even if they don't want me too...
It's not your fault you don't have to say sorry....
I'm just glad you take the time to care about me....
But promise me you won't forget about me if you make new friends okay...? ^_^
Have a nice trip...
Awwwwwww Thanks bro. It's okay. It is good. [:
You're the most stupid person I ever met..... But.... I still like you....
I guess you're not wrong and I'm not right either.. We all think differently.... But.. It's not like I know what I really think....
I just think everything is equal....
Why should you be scared of your parents getting divorced...?
I'm not sure if my father now is my real father cause my parents aren't married....
I have a step mother, step sister and step brothers....
My mother scolds me every single day and forcess me to study for 5 hourse everyday.....
I'm the second smartest in the whole class.....
I mostly get all As.... I've only got a C once in my whole life and I have never failed....
yet..... My mother never praises me... She thinks I'm an idiot...
She complains about me and always says that she wishes I never existed and that she wishes I weren't her daughter and how she wishes someone else was her daughter....
My father barely comes home and since I was little I always tried so hard to please him but he only says how good others are.....
I have no friends in real life and my mother hits me when I cry....
You don't see me complaining.... Even if your parents really divorce... They'll still love you...
And if they divorce and you feel sad for a long time you'll regret it.....
It won't make a difference if you always wander on your past....
............ If your wife didn't like you just because you pray and go to church she's an idiot and she doesn't really love you....
Someone that loves you wouldn't judge you by your appearence or what you do but who you are...
I don't know what I'm saying because no one has ever told me they loved me but you.. If you really mean it...
I don't know much about god.... I'm not even buddhist..... I'm no religion....
Don't hate me for saying this... But.... They always say god is good... God teaches you good...
But I don't agree with that.... because I don't believe anyone is fully good not even god... And... There is no right and wrong...
Sorry if you hate me now...
Understanding...? ...... The only thing I understand is that birds eat....
...... Sorry I'm so cold today... Am I cold...? I don't remember....
merged: 08-22-2007 ~ 09:31pm
You're the weirdest person I've ever met....
Well lucky you... Your father looked for you...
I'm always leaving the house at night and run to the park to sit on the swings and sing and I don't come home till the nest day... And when i come home my parents didn't even know I was gone...
All parents love their child... But I'm not even sure who are my parents....
My parents said I had a sister... then they say I was adopted... Then they say I'm engaged... Then they say my dad is not my real dad... then they say I have a step mother...
They keep on telling me strange things that it makes no difference to me anymore...
But.... If they really force me to marry someone I met 1 hour ago I'll run away from home... I'm sure they won't mind...
If I do leave my home they would forget I ever existed in a few days...
You know... Once.... I ran away from home for 2 months to stay with my friend in England and when I came back my mother thought I was in my room...
Dose it really make a difference if I exist...
My dad forgot my name 18 times this year...
And my mom mistaken another kid for me 13 times this year...
I still don't get you.... Did god really create us....?
I don't know... I'm an idiot....
You know.... I cry but I don't know why... And I laugh when... I don't know why...
And you know... I talk to birds and my reflection and animals and flowers.... I don't know why...
And...... I day dream every night about y...... I can't tell you or you'll laugh at me....
And...... I cut myself everyday for the purpose of I don't know... I just like it when I see tears....
Pain... Feels nice.....
Am I being insane again... Sorry....
Sorry..... I don't feel well today..... vatican...... please... please don't talk to me about Caroline or one of your friends if it's about how great they are and ow you worry about them this week..... Please....
Sorry..... But... Just for this week..... I really don't feel like listening to how great you think they are right now....
Uuumm.... Don't worry... It's not because I feel that you care about them more then me... And... I'm not jealous.....
Its just... I don't feel like listening to your complains this week....
I'm sorry..... I just really don't feel like making people happy this week..... I don't think I can anyway.... Esspecially with such a moody expression....
Have... A nice day....
Right now?........ Well....... sometimes I do have hard time keeping things together......
Lonely..... well......... Not too much because I do have friends here
Although I don't have too many friends in real life
By the way, how are you doing micey?
wow....i don't mean to take things the wrong way but in real life you mean out of the computer...
..just saying hahaha OO and im fine perfectly okay but now that vatican is sad
a bit....i don't know what to do!...
yeah...its just my opinion....hard...?sure... coz....u learn for it...and im not...so its hear romantic for me ^^'
oh i see...so its the lesson of ur school....?
mhmm...ok..see ya...^^
hi vatican-chan.....
are you sad or lonely?
i was just asking because you used to be sad and lonely right?
ya...but i'm not sure if i'll be able to make friends...hmmm.....i don't really care.....
it's like three girls in each room...and currently i'm the only one in my room...the others who are to share the room with me will arive next week....so till then i'm alone....
exal....i don't really understand her much......ha...i can't even understand myself.....
hmm....good you know it....coz sometimes i don't know why people get angry at me...and ya sometimes i do know.....
ok so....i'm glad things will get alright with you.....
well....then.....Good Luck with life.....and take care....
bye!
You idiot... Who said anything about not caring for your friends... Anyway..... Even if I did say it.... If you believed what I said I'll hate you even more....
Because I trusted that you thought I really cared about you... And if I did I wouldn't ask you to stop caring for anyone....
I hate humans... They're a waste of oxygen..... I'm always caring about others.... Always trusting them and smiling every single day... Every moment....
I hate it..... I hate faking to be happy... I hate everyone.....
I wish I never existed.... I trusted you... I thought you believed me.... So.... Thank you for telling me you were like everyone else..... I wonder how it feels to jump down a roof....
But I won't die for such foolish reasons.... I'm not a coward....
I hate trusting people..... Absolutely hate it.....
I only live to sing..... Well... Of course I did live because I wanted to spend time with you.....
But you're an idiot.... Who's the mean one...? You don't even understand.....
I hate you the most..... More than anyone that ever betrayed me... I hate you.....
I would hate you for as long as I live... No... I'll hate you forever.....
When I'm dead or alive..... I'm an idiot.... Because I trusted you.....
merged: 08-19-2007 ~ 03:29pm
You're an idiot! That's what I hate about you the most!
You're always blaming yourself for everything..... But don't you have any hope at all....?
You have friends who care about you and you're not alone....
But you're always acting like this world is so horrible and you always think sacraficing for your friends was good....
No wonder Caroline never got happy... Because... How can someone with no hope at all try to give hope to someone else!
You're an idiot!
Your friends care about you! You're not the only one suffering when you feel sad! Your friends are also sad when you're sad!
But.... Still... Even when they themselves are sad..... They're always trying to help you....
Why are humans so stupid!
They think that sacraficing for the people they care about.... When they sacrafice for them they feel happy...
Those kind of people are the real selfsish people!
they never think of how the person they sacraficed for would feel!
they never thought that they might be even more sad knowing someone important to them suffered for them....
Why can't humans ever understand.....? Why are they always thinking wrong is right....? Why are they always such idiots...? Why....?
No matter how many times I tell them over and over.... All they say is I'm always so sad....
fine... They're right... I'm as stupid as them.... I'm always sad but I always try to make others not sad....
We all have our problems... The richest person with everyone serving him is still sad....
Why are humans never satisfied for what they have.... Everyday they only think "My life is so horrible.... I wish I was dead..." but....
Each time they say that.... the people who care about them suffer double the pain.....
It's harder to see someone you care about suffer then suffering yourself....
but I'm not a coward like you stupid humans! I am as dumb but I'm not as cowardly!
Because I never ever tell myself how much I hate this world..... I never try to think of those things....
Because I know I have people who care about me and that I don't have to go through life alone....
My parents can be mean at times but still I know they still love me.... because when I'm sick they're there for me....
My father doesn't always do what I was hoping... In fact... He never dose.....
He forgets my birthday and he barely comes home and he always lies....
but I know he just wanted the best for me.....
Your mother and father sigh and scold you not because they want to see you suffer....
they're worried about you..... Is that really wrong.....?
I'm sure.... Your parents fight but they still love eachother....
You love them, I'm sure of it..... But you're always hiding from them.....
If you told them how you feel.... they might not know what to do.....
But i'm sure... Sure that they are trying really hard to understand you and make your life better......
like caroline... Even though she is so sad.... She always tells you to be happier and she tries really really hard....
All your friends try their hardest to make you happy...... They really really do......
Just like you said of how much you hate Koreans.....
Koreans... Chinese... Japanese...... And all the other religions.... Is there really a difference....?
You said you would only marry a Christian.... But..... Christian or not they're still human...?
I know I might not know much about god and those things...
but I know... Even god is not fully good..... No one is fully good....
Like me..... i may always try my best to make everyone happy...
But the truth is I'm selfish, bad tempered and not as good as you thought...
Goddess of mercy... Jesus... Budah.... What difference is there....? They're all gods.....
For those who believe in god.... god is..... God...... All these gods have the purpose of bringing happiness ^_^
So..... God... Shost... Or human.... We're just like one ^_^
God... Is not fully good... Shost is not fully bad... And human is just in between... Good... And bad....
maybe people believe in god... Because long time ago there was this really smart person that believed humans were created by god and ghost, god as good and ghost as bad and together they form a human....
So please understand that we are all important.....
Have a nice day ^_^
Ahhhhh~~~~
Of course I did!
And ummm...
It's had passed your birthday for a long time..
...but Hopefully not too late for a cake~
...
> <
i reached....it was about 12 the plane landed...it was a boring journey...i had to pay for the food...so i only bought cookies.....
the institute is not that bad...it's ok...some of the students i met were nice......we are only allowed to check our mail here if we want to sit on the internet.....so i'm sitting in a cyber cafe now......and i don't think i can come here every time.....*
exal...no i don't think so...she never has any problem making friends.....
WHAAAAT! how can any body get angry at such a cute chubby little boy....
er...what's happening around you? sorry, but i can ask...can't i? did something go wrong....
hmm...i want to learn japanese...
be happy ok....see ya..i'll try coming online again soon...
you prefer Fresh milk ~?
Okies. *
brings in a carton of them into your room*
Ah, I prefer Orange juice but I can't intake them too much `cause I suffer from a sensitive immunity system.
Well, all will be well once 31st Aug comes.
cause right
now I am having my examinations. Ah, what do you like to eat ? what's the
weirdest stuff you ever tasted ? It's bat meat to me. I didn't know it was Bat
meat till my Mum told me so. 0_o It's sweet and tastes like chicken but
uguu~.... @_@ I agree with the line, " Some things are best left unknown
".
......... Caroline... Pikac/aania..?
I'm sure exal loves her.... She's just stubborn and doesn't show it....
Exal has always been like that... Don't mind her....
She's stubborn and she gets angry really easily and she never admits it when she dose something wrong...
But even though she doesn't show it she truly cares about her friends and family....
.......... I don't want to be happy.... Because as long as I'm sad people will care about me.....
If I'm happy I'll think about sad things so I can be sad forever....
I hate it when people talk about caring about others... Hate it hate it hate it...
I hate my father because he only loves me with a quater of his heart....
I hate you because you never stop talking about others!
HATE YOU HATE YOU HATE YOU!
splitting? no...what i meant was we all will just be living in different places....splitting sounds a strong word....
er...i feel that you're thinking that i'm really sad about something.....well, no no...i'm not....it's just that i'm a little stressed out and nervous about going there.....
exal.....ahhh....i don't know...she's ok....but sometimes she really sounds very rude....she'll be happy now that i'm leaving.....
and what exactly do you mean by acting?
do you
think i'm lying? or lied? or something like that......
oh yes...ofcourse i'm much better if i'm typing...coz i think and write........sometimes....
but if i'm talking to someone face to face or on the phone.....well, it's different....i don't really think much beore speaking....and i get angry very soon....
vatican....if you're feeling sad coz of me....pls dont...i don't want to make anybody sad...
so what foreign language are you interested in?
and i finally have everything packed and ready....my flight is tommorow at 9am, i'll be laeving from home at 7am though....
so little vatican...be safe...and try not to be sad.... enjoy life.... and do continue writing to me....or i'll cry....
<^^*)(*^^*SMILE PLS*^^*)(*^^>
merged: 08-18-2007 ~ 01:18am
one more thing...Thank you
.....for taking time to write to me and also....for being my little brother...
..... Maybe you're not that bad.... Maybe I should think about marrying you afterall...
Haha! Just kidding! ^_^
Well killing is wrong... But you can't blame your wife for caring about you and taking revenge...
merged: 08-17-2007 ~ 11:49pm
I don't want to be happy.... I wish I could be sad forever.....
Hi!
I'm at back home now~^^
I'd arrived on the 13th but I'm quite busy so I don't have time for MT ...
TT^TT
~~~~~~~~
Well...most of them are Chinese people who immigrated to France.
I really had a great time there, the people are so nice!
I missed them alot...
YOU ARE SO SWEET!
You are
sooo not good enough for me! Yes yes!
You do get embarresed..... Always....
Well... Think what you like! You do get embarresed....
>_> ...... Well...... I mean.... You're not that bad....... Pretty cute..... Of course not!
What makes you think I would want to marry you! Of course not! Haha! Never!
...... Christian...... Christian..... Christian...... Mmm.... Nope! I'm still not Christian!
...... Wouldn't that be selfish...? If your wife saves that person... She will feel sad for the rest of her life without you....
CORRECT! People who kill are NOT heroes! A+++ for that answer! ^_^
it's not something new in my life.....since both my parents are in the defence....so they get transfers every year...and we have to move.....it takes me so long....atleast a year to get used to everyone....and then finally when i get some friends....we have to leave.....my parents are going to get another transfer next year......well, he was supposed to get two years back.....but since this place is really good for schooling...he decided to take 2 years study leave which is gonna end next year....i think my parents are planning to send exal to some boarding next year.....and i don't think my mom will get posted to the same place as my dad....so it seems by next year....all four of us will be living separately....
my dad told me to complete the rest of the packing in the evening.....he went to sleep ....and my mother is not at home...and exal won't help
...and i
can't do it alone..... 
to be happy while i'm living? hmm....ya, nobody knows what's going to happen in death....exal keeps telling i'll be thrown into the fiery lake of hell and burn there forever.....ok, all she said was i think you'll end up in hell.....and i keep asking her what have i done.......all she says you're just meaneee.....sometimes i wonder am i really that evil to make someone think i'll be thrown into....oh well, i don't really believe in hell or heaven.....what strucks me is...am i that bad or......evil
about elizabeth.....i think you really have comforted her a lot....and that's really nice....she seems very happy talking to you....
wish i could be nice too like you...wish i could help others....but i know i can't....looks like that's how my nature is....but, i won't give up...i don't want to...i'm not evil....
PE....i never liked that either....for a warm up we needed to take three circles of the ground....and the ground of our school was so huge.....
...so what subjects do you have for choices?
meet you....
...... ummm...that's...do you think something like that can
happen?....i really get nervous when i've to meet somebody...and i end up giving
such a serious look that the other person think i'm gonna eat him any
minute........but, ya i do want to meet my little brother....
you be careful ok...and specially from that super mega giant scary typhoon....